I felt a dire need to blog today, something which happens as often as once in a green moon.
So much has happened, too much has happened. I used to think that a couple of years or a decade prolly makes no difference to a person. Boy, was I ever wrong.
I profess that the years in which Jane has gone through remarkable changes would be from year 2011 to till now. and, yes, im still in made-in-progress mode.
My first real transformation happened when I quit S*vcsource. Why? Because I entered into the world of financials. I was introduced to the world of finance, and I realised that the click of money really made me tick. I was in love. With this exposure, I took to trading sg equities. So thank you, Jane of 2011, for making such an important decision in time.
My second transformation was during the period where I worked for DZ & C*ss (Cuss). Although time time spent there was really not too much to brag about given that I wasn't given any salary at all, I learnt how to speak and present and negotiate at real corporate meetings. I saw how the business setting was important, how the timing was important, and choosing the angle the world sees you was important. Although I still feel disgust when I think about you, you lousy hell of a boss, I'm glad I stood and observed. I learnt why receipts were important. I learnt why having black and white is important. And more importantly, I also learnt how to not let my future staff disrespect me by learning the direct opposite of what you do. It was a lousy time, but it was worth its mention in time. All these exposure led me to Senior Account Manager of an MNC. I remember thanking God for this.
(As a side note, thanks also for letting me go through hell when I went for MOM investigation and court session. And thank God also that, even though Alex wasn't fighting by my side, at least you sent Edmund to help me overcome this period of extreme grief and shock.)
My third transformation, was when I broke up with Edmund. Thanks be to God for making me realise that sometimes loving less is loving more. I was edging towards possessiveness, yet blinded by it. I wanted the whole world to be just him and me. I stepped over the line, I told him that if he could forsake his friends I will stop going out with mine too. Bad move, and I can see why now. The clear minded and focused jane could see why now. Loving less is loving more. Literally. Spread the love. Family love, friendship care, everyone could use an extra dosage of love and concern, why concentrate it all on one person and make him stress? yes, I could see now why he broke up with me then, the past-jane. But boy oh boy, the pain was torturous, I hope i'd never have to go thru this pain ever again. (I drowned out my sorrow using hard liquor on rocks and wine and studying stocks and charts. Go figure.)
My fourth transformation was work related. I really hated all that I had to go thru when I was a broker, but im glad it happened. It made me realise that money wasn't all that I was looking for, I was looking for pride and dignity as well. I got none of that when I was a junior broker, because the seniors basically were inhuman. Yes, the money was good, but i'd much rather keep my pride and sanity, thankyouverymuch. Waking up at 6.30am for work and forcing me to work til the wee hours at 3.30am isn't very humane, judging by most people's standards. not being able to go eat during lunch and having to watch u eat is inhumane. really. the money's good, but no thanks. the people *really* sucks.
Brokers adore traders and worship them like gods. Naturally, I started to look for trader position in my next job search. eventually, yes, I got to be a trader, but the job is radically different. I got to be a proprietary trader, which basically means analysing charts and figures for hours on end and making the right trades after analysing the right buy and sell trades. I would make profit for the company in this manner. The skills came in really handy for my regular trading soon after, and continues to remain a top skill in my life.
After that basically I went on to pursue an honours degree in finance (something which I swore I wouldn't do from 2007 to 2012), and got into the business of fund management (a job which I could have landed myself in when I graduated from poly in 2007). But looking back, had I made the supposedly "right" choices at the first turn of my life, I doubt I would have learnt and garnered the array of skills I learnt, and be humbled by the experience.
Toy Promoter > Credit Card Roadshow Promoter > Admin girl > Front Desk Exec > Banker > Sales Representative (Account Mgmt) > Account Mgmt Exec > Senior Account Manager > Oil Broker > Trader > Fund Manager
I'm still made-in-progress. Let's see what I'll become in a few years time.