Hello, my name is paper and I am a piece of paper.
My purpose is to have people write on me and to be printed by printers.
I like the smell of wood because it smells like my parents.
My ambition is to be thrown away and recycled.
(lmao i don't know what to put in here, so thanks Claire for the message.)
saw the BS messages in his hp awhile back (12/03 - sam & forum, 13/03 - kenneth night, 14/03 - kenneth day, "no meet" - sam & victor)
wanted to confront him so bad but i held it back. i don't want to have a big commotion all over again lor.
but 2 days ago during work, when he called i just cannot tahan it anymore, so i asked
"when's the last time u go to BS?"
"Last time uni time, very long ago already.." (??? the msgs so recent!)
"is it? so u never go recently?"
"Told u very long ago already"
"never go with the guys before? sam they all?" (thinking of sam and kenneth's smses)
"no la.. never.." (!!!)
"so what's bs like one? got do all those full inside one?"
"no.. they cannot.. nowadays v strict already.. since my uni days they set more & more restrictions day by day lor.. cannot this cannot that, so now in the end is touch only, totally not worth to go."
"so u never go with the guys?"
"kenneth whole day keep asking but i just ignore his msg one. cos like a bit off form to go with him, sam and vic & myself agree on that, so we just don't care when he asks. somemore he got zr & ryan to pei him what."
"if he knows that u will just keep ignoring his sms then he keep sending u for what? waste sms?"
"he got to try ma.. lack people..then cannot be he ask wx or kenny ma.. cos more possible for us to go than them ma, anyway i will just reply kenneth go find sam find victor whoever to get him off my back, then after that he also never reply me le.."
"ok, so kenneth off form but sam & victor? never go with them?"
"never, sam got jio once but somehow schedule dun fit or something in the end never go." "Dear, if somehow sam persist on i may have to end up going someday. Can i go?"
(afterthought) "u can go provided u don't do anything."
"i wont do anything one! the whole place so dirty, i just go for their company's sake only. anyway if really go, it will be more of a fun friend gathering more than a shoik thing, if u get what i mean."
"then u see sam and victor doing something u wont gian?"
"i just watch free show la. i wont gian cos i go so many times last time & the place is so not hygienic. after i share with sam, sam also agree the place not hygienic. he even says no exchange lor. can u imagine, sam go so little times also not gian. Somemore so expansive, top up a bit can get korean, i might as well get korean if like that say."
"u not gian cos the place unhygienic. ok, then after the session u call fl leh? then how? i think that's my worst fear lor."
"aiyah i wont one, so expansive! everytime i see all these i keep reminding myself it's a waste of money. it's not 1 whole day leh, it's just an hour. the money i can use to buy 2 games, buy wallet for you, eat good food, do so many things! everytime i see this i just keep thinking it's a waste of money, money, money. so in a way u should hope that i don't strike lottery, haha! or if strike, u look after all the money la."
(relenting) "so u promise not to do anything? dear, i need to know i can trust u. i need a man i can trust. im not going to marry a man who's gonna lie to me."
"no la, i just go sing & drink only. same price as k & partyworld."
"call me to ask for permission before u go"
"uh?"
"what if i feel very insecure that day? then how? must see mood one ma. but most likely is can one, as long as u go call and ask me. i just need to know only. eh don't push it ah, i'm very liberal already hor. I think you have the best girlfriend in the whole wide world!" -humph-
"i know, all the more i'm right about u being the right one for me. wx cant even watch p!"
"i just want to say all these out cos i know house selection is coming. not being emo or anything. don't want to wait until select house already then say these sort of thing. might as well see if we cant agree on these terms then we talk about it, else the house we just forget about it. i want to say all these cos i need a husband i can trust. i scared married already then i cannot be pretty too keep u, u leave halfway thru marriage i don't want that."
"dear, i want to marry you means that i'm committed to you. marrying is not like boyfriend and girlfriend one leh, cos we will have kid to take care of. of cos u can dress up be pretty, but i want to keep u with me means u no need to put in such effort. it's will be like how my mum & dad is like now la, not so scary like u imagine one la. then got kid i will be even more committed to u, cos i will think of my family every time. i look forward to family outings, got our kids, got u, we bring them out to eat on sunday.. like this la!"
"then i pregnant that time unattractive cannot keep u, how.."
"where got unattractive? everyday is a day closer to the birth of our baby leh."
"ok lor u say one huh. i need be able to trust the person i marry, else i rather don't marry. later see my husband run with another woman after i have baby, still need to feed baby, v chum. dear, why do u want to marry?"
"because i look forward to staying together with u, i think we stay together will be fun. then can do legally. and have our kid..."
"... whole day talking about kid. lol. just grab any woman on the street who's ready to have kids with u immediately la......" lol.
i really want to trust him. i really hope i can trust him.